May, time for a phoney war set to end in July. The dispossessed have heard it all before. Politicians drop J-curves to hook the unwary. Believers anguish and stress and resolve. Commentators serve up half-baked opinions for breakfast shows. Mortgages hope for the best. Hacks express one-dimensional slogans. Bogans don’t give a toss. Newsreaders fail to outfox their newsfeeds. A treasurer is worth 2/6 at Coles. Refugees have the scars to prove it. Voters want their J-curve to go round the 8-ball. Bigots have big gobs to prove it. Celebrities wonder out loud, it’s a wonder. Too hot for May.