BBC 19th century dramas reassure us we may
cross the street, hat or no hat. Jaywalking begins about 1915, around the same
time as traffic light technology. The police are so concerned for our safety,
not to get knocked over by a jalopy. Disconcertingly, police can ask for our
identity if we jaywalk. Despite being “staggeringly inaccurate”, with facial
recognition technology police will try to identify jaywalkers; easy if your
head’s a potato, less so if it’s beatlesque broccoli. Jaystalkers’ facial
recognition will contend with a permanent run on hats. Umbrellas, ornate their
J-handles, will be fashion all year round.
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