In my dream the Australian Open is being played in backstreets of the suburbs. The documentary shows leafy avenues and old-fashioned verandahs, with players fending for themselves on vacant blocks or concrete carparks. One game between champions is on a dirt driveway covered in leaves. Balls struck into rising ground are retrieved by the contestants, who slip about on uneven gradients. There are few spectators, with possibly a referee. A voiceover makes neutral disingenuous statements like, “These conditions are very primitive.” Games go on for days, right into February, as the camera pans to more shots of home beautiful flowerbeds.